hating the internet

In the last couple of weeks there has been lots of bad news. A friend lost her grandmother, several other friends reported knowing someone in their family or group of friends who had died. My mother told me of at least three people she is friends with who have lost someone they love. Worst of all, one of my oldest and dearest friends lost her husband. Too much.

Celia had a school project that required an old photo of her, so we looked through our photo boxes to find one she wanted to use. I found a photo from my first days at college, smiling in a dorm hallway with a big group of friends. Whatever happened to so-and-so, I wondered? So I googled his name.

I may hate the internet now. I found his obituary, from June 2006. Two full years ago, and I never knew. There's no other information either. Just date and place. Quite possibly one of the finest people I ever knew, and someone whose friendship I always regretted losing track of over the years. I thought of him often, wondered if he'd ever married and had the children he deserved, if he was still helping people, being active in his church. Guess I'll never know now. All those "I should contact" and good intentions for keeping in touch - how I regret them now.

The internet is great, but somethings are better left unknown I suppose.

difficult days

Well, it's been difficult days lately. Two friends have suffered deaths in their families. One asked me to preside at the funeral, which I did, and I'm so glad. Really hard, but it was the right thing to do.

The bright spot for me was that James surprised us with a visit. Business in Connecticut for him, lots of smiles and hugs for us. We shared a family favorite meal (deep dish spinach pizza) and show (Survivor!). The simplest things are the ones that matter, and that's what we were able to share. Simply sitting around a table, hearing the girls pray, sharing conversation about the day, laughing over little things.

In the midst of all this, my school is in high gear - last crunch for reading, time to get the writing going, study for exams. Good thing the girls want a simple Thanksgiving, because I won't have time for a big production. They like to help with cooking now, so I'm ready to find out what kind of dishes they want to make for dinner. As long as there is a cranberry-apple pie and a BIG pan of stuffing, I'll be happy.

Today's scripture was Psalm 100 - enter God's gates with thanksgiving. That's not easy when people are hurting, grieving, or struggling. It's not easy when you are lonely or stressed out. But starting with thanks helps to put everything into perspective. There are times when I argue with God about things. There are times I cry to God, and no words will do. Today, talking with the children, it was clear again how to start with gratitude and trust. The Spirit is guiding me, and for that I am deeply grateful.

Daylight Spending Time

So I was thinking this morning, with the extra hour I had... if it's called "daylight savings time" does that mean that when we switch back it's "daylight spending time"?

It's just gone 5pm and there's a thumbnail sliver of a moon hanging up in the velvet sky. Beautiful, but it's early still. One of the hardest things for me to adjust to up here in New England is the very short days during the winter.

As much as like the change of the seasons, the shift to dark is hard for me to embrace. I'm sure the lessons to be learned from seasons and change are important, and I'm sure the lesson about patience and waiting are ones I am still learning, but that doesn't make it any easier.

Today we had acolyte training at church. Several grade school kids wanted to learn how to light the candles before worship. The symbolism of bringing in and taking out the light, combined with their young and hopeful spirits made my day. Perhaps their eager embrace of the light can be an example.